My original post that started this series of “The Power of Your First Sexual Experiences” started with a poll regarding what topic was in high demand, and the people have voted! Here’s my second post on the topic the majority wanted to hear about.
I began my last post by mentioning how we all remember our first sexual experience and why that first experience was so memorable. This post will focus on the power of the timing in regards to first sexual experience. I am going to keep this article concise but if you want to read further, check out the Psychology Today article “Can Your Sexual Debut Predict Your Future?” I want to make sure I give credit to the author, Noam Shpancer, who analyzed researcher, Paige Harden’s study. Quotes are from this article.
The Study
Paige Harden, a researcher at University of Texas, analyzed data from a longitudinal study on more than 1600 pairs of siblings from the ages of 15-29. Between the ages of 15-29, Harden divided the constituents into three groups pertaining to their sexual debut:
1. The early group (Those who had sex for the first time at or before the age 15).
2. The “on-time” group (Those who first had sex between the ages of 15-19).
3. The late group (those who waited until 20 years of age to have sex).
“Harden tested several quality measures of the participant’s adult lives as linked to their sexual initiation data.” Interestingly, Harden’s data showed no differences between the ‘early’ and the ‘on-time’ groups.”
Here’s Where it Gets Good!
The group in this study who did not have sex until at least the age of 20 had significant findings. “[This group] earned more money, acquired more education, had fewer partners and reported far fewer problems with their marriages.”
There are many different theories for this finding. It may be because an adolescent had good parenting (and listened to it), learned the value of delayed gratification, were highly selective, had high religious/moral values, or maybe they were just scared to have sex while a teenager. It could also be that those who had their first sexual experiences in the late group were spared from those awkward sexual teenage experiences that can leave deep emotional wounds. The answer will depend on the individual.
Conclusion
It seems to me that in our culture which tells us to do what we want, we are not being told that that may not be the wisest decision. Maybe we should start praising those who committed to sexual faithfulness and view them with a high social status—instead of the well-sculpted Romeo-types who gets all the girls. After all, those who waited until they were at least 20 years of age to have sex, “earned more money, acquired more education, had fewer partners and reported far fewer problems with their marriages.”
There may be some readers thinking, “Well, I just have to wait until I am 20 years of age and then I can sexually explore!” If that’s the case, I hope you realize it is much more than that. For those interested, you can read “My Story of Sexual Faithfulness” or “What if We are not Sexually Compatible.”
There is so much more that can be said on this topic but I wanted to make sure the post was concise.
Share your thoughts or questions below.